Just for the hell out of it, here’s a little list of the terrible, awful and, more than usual, stupid questions I usually get regarding my sexuality. You might want to check and try not to ask these questions to any lesbian you might meet. And I will say here, whatever the f*** I really wanted to say during the time you asked these damned questions.

  1. “Hala ngano? Sayang gud ka ay.”

Well. Sayang are those people who waste their lives and time to people they are not happy with. Those people who endures the pain caused by people who hurt them. Sila ang sayang. Because they have all the world to take. They can do anything, be with someone who can make them happy. But they choose to be miserable. I am not “sayang” because I AM GENUINELY HAPPY.

  1. “Siguro natagam ka sa lalake noh?”

Oh god! This one. NO. I have been with “guys”. And most of those relationships aren’t that bad. They are not the ones who “left” and “hurt” me. It was me who cannot find happiness with the relationship. Even with the father of my own kid, I can say that he made the greatest effort just to be with me again. But it’s really just doesn’t feel “right” at all. So, again, NO. Wala ko natagam. Basin sila pa gani natagam sa akoa.

  1. “Walay nanguyab sa imo na lalake?”

This one is funny. It doesn’t mean, that if no guy is courting me, I will settle with the same sex. It’s practically saying that I am settling for the “less”. WTF? I am settling with the “best” for me. And also, just for the record, there are guys who courted me. I tried, believe me, I tried to “connect” with them but it’s a forced effort and I cannot settle on that.

  1. “So, wala ka gimingaw ug bunal?”

Hahahahahahhahahaha! If you know what I mean. Oh gosh. This is one of the most stupid ones. Relationship and happiness isn’t always about sex. Yes, it’s part of it but if you base your happiness with sex? You are way down there fellah! I do not “miss” that thing between guy’s thighs. It’s absurd, especially when guys ask this. They think so highly of themselves because they have it. Hey! I won’t get attracted to you because you have a dick. Your face looks like a dic
k itself yet I don’t go running after you because of it. Think of it.

  1. “Kinsa’y lalake sa inyo?”

What the hell? I am with a same sex relationship. Why should we decide who’s the “male”? I maybe usually attracted to someonewho’s lesser in feminity than me, but I still see her as a woman like I am. So stop it. We are both females. Deal with it.

  1. “Dili awkward sa public?”

They mean, showing affection in the public’s eye. No. It’s not awkward. Because if you love the person you are with, you will not be ashamed to show the world, regardless the gender, age, and whatever. I ofte
n get this “look” from people that will make you feel like a freak show, but when this happens, mugara ko. I cling the hell out of the person I am with. Just to slap people out of their judgmental grimace. And one more thing, I don’t care what other people think.

  1. “Pero mag minyo man jud ka in the future di ba?”

I will marry the person I love. Even without the blessing of any religion or government. Marrying for me is not just signing the papers or saying the phony vows in front of people. Marriage is the unity of two people’s heart and to swear that it is “them” for eternity. I may or may not have found that person yet, but one thing is for sure, I will not marry someone just because the society dictates me to do so.

  1. “Gwapa gud ka ay. Daghan pa magkagusto na lalake sa imo.”

I always answer with “eh di bagay pud ko sa gwapa.” And boy, it pisses them off.

So does it mean that if a girl is pretty, they are only meant to end up with a guy? You guys are so fond of watching lesbian porn and jerk the hell out of it. But when you see a real life lesbian couple, it pisses you off. What store did you buy this kind of hypocrisy? Just accept the fact that some pretty girls end up with another pretty girl.

  1. “Makuntento pud ka?”

Usually this pertains to sex and usually asked by guys who are rather insecure because they can’t make it to bed with a girl. Firstly, if we are not close friends, you are an asshole asking this kind of question. Secondly, yes, the greatest ones I had are with the same sex. Suck it up! Having a dick doesn’t make you a sex god.

  1. “Dili ka mahadlok ma impyerno?”

Oh I am pretty sure we’ll see each other there (if it really exists). You think you’re so pure and clean because you are in a “normal” relationship. Hey, sorry to burst your bubble, but if it is so true, even thinking ill to your fellow human makes you a sinner. So, don’t be so sure that you will be welcomed in heaven with open arms of St. Peter.

I think this sum it up. There are other few but these are the most common and what grinds my gear. If you are one of the people who asked me these, I do not mean to be rude. I am talking in general. Other people have to deal with these questions too and I am talking in behalf of them. Just to shed some light in your confused back dated brains.