The tough part on being in a complicated relationship is the choice whether to leave or to stay. But there is no way of knowing which will happen until you take the risk and LEAVE. But what is more hurtful than to stay knowing that the relationship will not develop into something that you expected.
There comes a point where you really don’t have any idea what’s in store for your future if you keep hanging on to the past, or worse, a mediocre present.
Men are egotistical players. A man generally means what he say. If he is asking you to leave, directly, or indirectly your choice is always easy: Leave! Sometimes it is that simple and a man clearly breaks things off with you.
Don’t be afraid to ask. For example, if the person you’ve been dating for a few months suddenly falls off the face of the earth, be upfront with them. Ask what’s going on, or why they’ve been distant and listen to the answer, taking real cues from what they says.
Give them space. Sometimes what we need is a time to think. Give them that space; don’t pepper they with questions and ultimatums with the hope that he will simply bend to what you’ve decided a relationship means.
Do your thing. Enjoy the same space you’ve offered them. Don’t just give them space and wait. Make REAL space by doing your own thing, hanging with friends and giving thought to the type of relationship you would like to have, whether it’s with them, or not.
Your hobbies, goals, career, friends and family all hold a very important place in your life, so enjoy them! In today’s instantly gratifying world, we all need our own lives, interests, goals and ambitions to offer into a relationship.
Don’t be too Dramatic. As we know, Social media is a fun way to keep up with friends, old and new, but when you’re dating someone new or breaking up with someone, it can be the most dangerous thing.
Before you know it, you’re constantly checking in and sharing quotes with Papa Jack by “liking” everything, with absolutely no awareness that it all directly relates to your current feelings.
BE HONEST with yourself. If you are only calling them and wait until they suggests a date spot or for them to cry hysterically and beg them to say all the right things to make your tears rest, then STOP right where you are and smash your phone against the wall because you’re being crazy.
Trust the person you’re with and the choice you’ve made in being with them. If you can’t, it’s time to leave.
You made a choice to leave the relationship, and it’s important you remember why you decided this. This doesn’t mean you will never speak to this person again, or even get back together, but if you are already at the point of telling the other person you wish to part ways, something inside of you wants to.
The only way to truly know is to stay committed to your choice, giving yourself time and space to find out what’s best for you.
Know yourself. They always come back. ALWAYS. It may take, days, months or even years, but when you stand your ground and respectfully walk away, they eventually follow you back in one form or another.
They will miss you, wonder what you’re up to and why you are so fine without them. The key is to never WAIT for the comeback.
At the point of his return, it will be a matter of if you are still interested and find the relationship worth pursuing again. The right person for you won’t need long to clean up their act and be right back at your side.
Just know why you’re gone, why you need to stay gone and it may be hard to do, but your future self will thank you for the respect and courage.
By offering yourself love and respect, when the best person for you comes along (or comes back along), he will have a better understanding of you and what you want out of your own life, and the relationship. Conversations will be clearer, and fights and arguments will become productive, not petty.
Learning all about what makes you tick makes it far easier for someone else to enter your life and stay, enriching both your lives and relationship for the better.
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